Author: substitute

nope

A quiz for “Bree”

http://quizilla.com/users/SwissCelt/quizzes/How%20fluffy%20a%20Pagan%20are%20you%3F/

“He’s icky!!”

For those not residing in my locality, Bree is your typical Magick-obsessed transgendered grocery store bagger. She’s really nice but will pin you to the wall and discuss Aleister Crowley at you until your eyes bleed. All is the One and the One is One of the All and Evil is Good is Evil is Cheetos. Blaaaaaar.

Since I have a full set of bizarre, irrational ideas about the world I make great efforts to be tolerant. However, sometimes other peoples’ ideas about the universe are.. well… fluffy?

Inspector #12 would like a vacation

tuliphead: so, “Neuticles”, fake testicle implants for neutered animals, come in two styles – harder plastic polypropylene ones, and total silicon onces, which are “softer, spongier, and more realistic”

Onanity: Don’t want your pet cat’s fake testicles to feel abnormal for guests

tuliphead: which begs the question, who is fondling their dogs’ testicals, checking for realness?

ignatz: The saddest QA dept you’ve ever seen.

tuliphead: ignatz++

Onanity: Filed under “Yes, There Are Worse Jobs”

asshole moratorium suggestion?

It has been subtly pointed out to me a couple of times (you know who you are) that I’m pretty harsh on people, including people that don’t deserve it.

I realize that about 80% of my humor and smalltalk is negative, often about basically nice people who aren’t perhaps the best targets.

Also, it’s painfully obvious that I’m the typical Angry Comedian in a lot of ways. Enraged at things I cannot fix, I savage anything nearby to produce humor, which then causes others to laugh and like me.

I’m going to try to stop doing this for a while. New rule: the Sarcastron-9000 only gets directed at the “truly needy”, deserving targets.

Please call me on it immediately if I start talking shit, even amusingly, about people who don’t need to get hurt like that. Even just hurt in a voodoo doll way.

Thanks,

the Management