the lunch of monkey is the root of all kinds of emo

(Click here to post your own answers for this meme.)

I miss somebody right now.  (Several people, actually. It’s kind of painful.) I don’t watch much TV these days.  (This is odd because I work for a TV network.) I own lots of books.  (It’s a problem.)
I wear glasses or contact lenses.  (Not until I was 30, oddly, and I really needed them.) × I love to play video games(I like them okay if they show up but it’s not my thing.) × I’ve tried marijuana.
I’ve watched porn movies.  (Didn’t do anything for me. Not sure why, but probably because the people in them were gross.) × I have been the psycho-ex in a past relationship.  (N/A :/) I believe honesty is usually the best policy.
I curse sometimes. I have changed a lot mentally over the last year.  (And a damned good thing too.) × I carry my knife/razor everywhere with me.

* * * * *

× I have broken someone’s bones(Well, not that I know of.) × I have a secret that I am ashamed to reveal.  (I realized a few years ago that my secrets were all banal.) × I hate the rain.
× I’m paranoid at times.  (Not any more.) × I would get plastic surgery if it were 100% safe, free of cost, and scar-free.  (Maybe if I got moose antlers.) I need/want money right now.
I love sushi. I talk really, really fast. × I have fresh breath in the morning.  (Does anyone?)
× I have long hair(Hahaha) I have lost money in Las Vegas. I have at least one sibling.
× I was born in a country outside of the U.S. × I have worn fake hair/fingernails/eyelashes in the past. × I couldn’t survive without Caller I.D.  (I don’t use the phone a lot.)
× I like the way that I look.  (Boy I sure don’t.) × I have lied to a good friend in the last 6 months. × I am usually pessimistic(People say I am, but that’s not true. I’m very critical and skeptical but I don’t profess a bias towards the negative.)
I have a lot of mood swings.  (Stupid brain.) I think prostitution should be legalized. × I slept with a roommate.
× I have a hidden talent. × I’m always hyper no matter how much sugar I have.  (The sugar thing is a myth, you know.) I have a lot of friends.  (Or I think I do, anyway.)
× I have pecked someone of the same sex(I assume this means kiss, but it’s an odd usage.) × I enjoy talking on the phone.   (UGH) × I practically live in sweatpants or PJ pants.
× I love to shop and/or window shop. I’m obsessed with my Xanga or Livejournal.  (I’m a writer. It’s a problem.) × I’m completely embarrassed to be seen with my mother.
I have a mobile phone. × I have passed out drunk in the past 6 months.  (I don’t think I’ve ever passed out from alcohol.) I’ve rejected someone before.  (Not like I’ve had much opportunity to do so, but yeah.)
I currently like/love someone. × I have no idea what I want to do for the rest of my life. × I want to have children in the future.
× I have changed a diaper before. I’ve called the cops on a friend before.  (Drunk driving is bad.) I’m not allergic to anything.
I have a lot to learn.  (This is called being human.) × I am shy around the opposite sex. × I’m online 24/7, even as an away message.
I have at least 5 away messages saved.  (I am made of catchphrase.) I have tried alcohol or drugs before.  (No illegal drugs, not sure why.) × I have made a move on a friend’s significant other or crush in the past.  (Make a move? bahaha)
× I own the “South Park” movie. × I have avoided assignments at work/school to be on Xanga or Livejournal. I enjoy some country music.  (Hank Senior, Dwight Yoakam, and Merle!)
× I would die for my best friends(I mistrust people who say this.) × I’m obsessive, and often a perfectionist. × I have used my sexuality to advance my career.  (There are so many reasons why this idea is funny for me.)
× I think Halloween is awesome because you get free candy.  (What, are we 10 years old here?) × I have dated a close friend’s ex(Yeah, sure.) × I am happy at this moment.
× I’m obsessed with guys. Democrat. × Republican.
I don’t even know what I am.  (La condition humaine.) I am punk rockish.  (class of ’77) × I go for older guys/girls, not younger.
× I study for tests most of the time. × I tie my shoelaces differently from anyone I’ve ever met. × I can work on a car.
I love my job(s). × I am comfortable with who I am right now.  (hahahahahahahaha) × I have more than just my ears pierced.
× I walk barefoot wherever I can.  (I like not having holes made in my feet by sharp dirty objects.) × I have jumped off a bridge. × I love sea turtles.
× I spend ridiculous amounts of money on makeup. I plan on achieving a major goal/dream. × I am proficient on a musical instrument(Once I was.)
× I hate office jobs. × I went to college out of state. × I am adopted.
× I am a pyro. × I have thrown up from crying too much. I have been intentionally hurt by people that I loved.
× I fall for the worst people. × I adore bright colours. × I usually like covers better than originals.
I hate chain theme restaurants like Applebees and TGIFridays.  (Flingers.) I can pick up things with my toes. × I can’t whistle.
× I have ridden/owned a horse. × I still have every journal I’ve ever written in. I talk in my sleep.
× I’ve often thought that I was born in the wrong century(I distrust people who say this.) I try to forget things by drowning them out with loads of distractions.  (LA LA LA LA NOT LEADING A DAMAGED LIFE HERE MORE INTERNET PLEASE) × I wear a toe ring.
× I have a tattoo. I can’t stand at LEAST one person that I work with. I am a caffeine junkie.
× I am completely tree-huggy spiritual, and I’m not ashamed at all. × If I knew I would get away with it, I would commit at least one murder(Murder is an absolute wrong.) × I will collect anything, and the more nonsensical, the better.
I enjoy a nice glass of wine with dinner. × I’m an artist. × I am ambidextrous(Kinda. Right hand for scissors and shooting and knives, left hand for writing.)
× I sleep with so many stuffed animals, I can hardly fit on my bed. × If it weren’t for having to see other people naked, I’d live in a nudist colony. × I have terrible teeth.
× I hate my toes. × I did this meme even though I wasn’t tagged by the person who took it before me.  (I don’t do that “tag” shit.) × I have more friends on the internet than in real life.
I have lived in either three different states or countries. × I am extremely flexible(In what sense?) × I love hugs more than kisses.
× I want to own my own business(Nightmare.) × I smoke(I think I’ve given up. No cigars in months.) I spend way too much time on the computer than on anything else.  (That sentence is grammatically incorrect. Start over.)
× Nobody has ever said I’m normal. Sad movies, games, and the like can cause a trickle of tears every now and then.  (Games?) I am proficient in the use of many types of firearms and combat weapons.  (Not many types, but I can shoot.)
× I like the way women look in stylized men’s suits. I don’t like it when people are unpleased or seem unpleased with me.  (Spiral o’shame.) × I have been described as a dreamer or likely to have my head up in the clouds.
× I have played strip poker with someone else before. I have had emotional problems for which I have sought professional help. × I believe in ghosts and the paranormal.  (NO.)
× I can’t stand being alone(That used to be true. Not any more.) × I have at least one obsession at any given time. × I weigh myself, pee/poo, and then weigh myself again.
× I consistently spend way too much money on obsessions-of-the-moment. I’m a judgmental asshole. × I’m a HUGE drama-queen.
I have travelled on more than one continent. × I sometimes wish my father would just disappear.  (He died in 1993, asshole.) × I need people to tell me I’m good at something in order to feel that I am.
× I am a Libertarian. × I can speak more than one language(Used to.) × I can fall asleep even if the whole room is as noisy as it can be.
I would rather read than watch TV. I like reading fact more than fiction.  (Which is odd because I like to write fiction.) I have pulled an all-nighter on an assignment I was given a month to do.
I have no piercings. I have spent the night in a train station or other public place.  (The worst was a Denny’s.) × I have been so upset over my physical gender that I cried.
× I once spent Christmas completely alone because there was a miscommunication on which parent was supposed to have me that night. There have been times when I have wondered “Why was I born?” and may/may not have cried over it.  (The human condition again.) × I like most animals better than most people.
× I own a collection of retro games consoles. × The thought of physical exercise makes me shiver. × I have hit someone with a dead fish(I may have but do not recall.)
× I am compulsively honest. × I was born with a congenital birth defect that has never been repaired. × I have danced topless in front of dozens of complete strangers.
× I have gone from wishing I was a girl to revelling in being a boy to feeling like a girl again in the span of five minutes, and not cared a whit for my actual sex. × I am unashamedly bisexual, and have different motivations for my desires for different genders. I sometimes won’t sleep a whole night or eat a whole day because I forget to.
× I find it impossible to get to sleep without some kind of music on. × I dislike milk. × I obsessively wash my hands.
× I always carry something significant around with me. × Sometimes I’d rather wear a wig in day-to-day life than use my own hair. I’ve pushed myself to become more self-aware and thereby more aware of others.
× Even though I live on my own I still cry sometimes because I miss my mother. × I hand wrote all the HTML tags in this document.  (what) I’ve liked something which a majority of people claimed was either bad or weird.
× I have been clinically dead for a brief period of time. × Instead of feeling sympathy/empathy with people and their problems, I simply become annoyed. × I participate/have participated in auto drag races and won.
× I do not ‘get’ most comedy acts. × I don’t think strippers are money-greedy or slutty for dancing.  (The question is lame.) × I don’t like to chew gum.
× I am obsessed with history/historical things and can’t wait for someone to build a time machine so I can be the first to use it. × I can never remember for the life of me where I parked the car. I had the TEEN ANGST thing going for at least 2-3 years.
× I wish people would be more empathic and honest with each other.  (That’s a stupid sentence.) × I play Dungeons and Dragons weekly. × I love to sing.
× I want to live in my mother’s basement when I grow up.  (We don’t have basements in California.) × I have a custom-built computer. × I want to create a certain someone’s babies, even though there’s a 0% possiblity of ever achieving it.
× I would be in a relationship with one of my pets if they were human. × I’ve gone skinny-dipping. × I’ve performed in three plays.
I enjoy burritos. × I’m Irish and loving it. × I have a thing for redheads.
× I am a twin! × Most of the times, I’d rather do something intellectual instead of doing something generically ‘fun’.  (What a lame distinction.) × Once I set out to finish something, I always stay at it until it is completed before I move on to something else.
I wish there were a way to erase past mistakes.  (Well duh.) I sleep more than 12 hours a day.  (Lately it’s like 14.) × I wish I could be prouder of what I’ve accomplished, but it’s never enough.
× I need more time to myself. × I wish I was more open-minded. × I hope that I go really prematurely grey.
× I download songs from the internet. × I’ve just reenacted chapter 58 of Death Note with my best friend. × I say random things to freak people out.
× I’m still a little mad about the ending of Death Note. × I love playing Truth or Dare. × I love listening to slow music, but I hate singing to it.
× Music helps me remember that I am not alone. × Playing my favorite sport makes me temporarily forget my problems.  (I hate sports.) × I think this survey is particularly long.
× I prefer my LJ friends to my real-life ones. × I can only hate someone that I love. × I’ve ordered an extra two shots of espresso to an Americano at Starbucks.

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