31 thoughts on “Yikes

  1. Remain calm, Agent Ignatz. First, locate all the exits. Now, carefully turn around, slowly backing toward the clearest exit. You have to create a diversion. Pick up the nearest latte and slosh it onto the head of any hipster, suburbanite, teenager or soccer mom, screaming “J’accuse!” Now, run out.

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    1. coffee: the new gasoline
      It’s nothing like the Northwest yet, but there’s one at each end of that street, with a Peet’s, two Diedrich, an independent, and a no-name franchisee doing the same thing between them.

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      1. The funny thing is that this is an improvement over last year’s nutritional counts for the drink – I think it was around 1000 calories back in the belweather days of 2005!

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      2. Mmm, sugar. Whipped cream on iced beverages is wrong in any case, not that that helps much. But yeah, it’s a dessert. It’s a good one!

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    1. That one’s open until 1:30 a.m. and I can sit outside and look at the passing world. And I don’t always have the… fortitude for Cafe Ruba.

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      1. Yeah, Ruba is… well it’s something.
        I don’t enjoy it much myself.
        I think it is because I don’t enjoy hookah smoke and having everyone turn and stare at me when I walk into a place.

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      1. I think the Eddie Bauer 2007 comes with the Starbucks.
        You can order it at Walmart – maybe that’s where I got confused.
        I’m gonna give you a million dollar idea;
        Go to the maker of Tonka toy trucks. Tell them you want to license the Tonka name to Ford. Find a way to make them trust you enough to ingrain yourself into the paperwork.
        Now approach Ford Motors with the concept of releasing a Tonka line of 4X4’s. What red-blooded O.C. suburban male WOULDN’T want a big-ass truck with the name “Tonka” emblazoned on the side?!?
        no thanks necessary -just remember me at christmas time.

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      2. Re: You are four years out of date
        oh.
        i guess you wouldn’t wanna hear my idea about a portable phone you can take around with you then.

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