31 thoughts on “Yikes

  1. Remain calm, Agent Ignatz. First, locate all the exits. Now, carefully turn around, slowly backing toward the clearest exit. You have to create a diversion. Pick up the nearest latte and slosh it onto the head of any hipster, suburbanite, teenager or soccer mom, screaming “J’accuse!” Now, run out.

    1. coffee: the new gasoline
      It’s nothing like the Northwest yet, but there’s one at each end of that street, with a Peet’s, two Diedrich, an independent, and a no-name franchisee doing the same thing between them.

      1. The funny thing is that this is an improvement over last year’s nutritional counts for the drink – I think it was around 1000 calories back in the belweather days of 2005!

      2. Mmm, sugar. Whipped cream on iced beverages is wrong in any case, not that that helps much. But yeah, it’s a dessert. It’s a good one!

    1. That one’s open until 1:30 a.m. and I can sit outside and look at the passing world. And I don’t always have the… fortitude for Cafe Ruba.

      1. Yeah, Ruba is… well it’s something.
        I don’t enjoy it much myself.
        I think it is because I don’t enjoy hookah smoke and having everyone turn and stare at me when I walk into a place.

      1. I think the Eddie Bauer 2007 comes with the Starbucks.
        You can order it at Walmart – maybe that’s where I got confused.
        I’m gonna give you a million dollar idea;
        Go to the maker of Tonka toy trucks. Tell them you want to license the Tonka name to Ford. Find a way to make them trust you enough to ingrain yourself into the paperwork.
        Now approach Ford Motors with the concept of releasing a Tonka line of 4X4’s. What red-blooded O.C. suburban male WOULDN’T want a big-ass truck with the name “Tonka” emblazoned on the side?!?
        no thanks necessary -just remember me at christmas time.

      2. Re: You are four years out of date
        oh.
        i guess you wouldn’t wanna hear my idea about a portable phone you can take around with you then.

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