THE MOTHER OF ALL BUTTLES

The “health” “plan” from my last job has still not paid any of the claims from February to March of this year.

Today I got a bill from a collection agency for an $800+ charge, now with added interest.

A month ago I spoke to a “rapid resolution expert” at the health plan who was shocked, shocked at the lack of payment and pressed lots of buttons and told me it would be resolved in 30 days.

Nothing was done.

Today I spoke to another “rapid resolution expert” who was even more shocked and promised me a written response in 48 hours and resolution within ten business days. He gave me a magic string of digits which supposedly will make the collection agency back off.

Once again let me observe that I am at the very top of the privilege ladder here, and I’m getting reamed really hard.

medical plans are fun

My health plan has a website on which I may see my information, including claims and how my flexible spending account is going. Yay. Let’s go look and see what FSA claims are outstanding and how much cash I might get soon. Click.

“The information you’ve requested is unavailable Monday – Friday 10pm – 7am, Saturday 8pm – 7am, and Sunday 6pm – 7am (all times are eastern standard time). We are sorry for this inconvenience.”

What the fuck. Do the Insurance Web Gnomes go home, or something?