kniwt was kind enough to point out that I was right in March 2007, and others have been kind to point out that I was right in July 2003 about the oncoming subprime mortgage tsunami.
I’d love to call myself a prophet, but most of us in Newport saw that one coming. Too bad the financial journalists didn’t get to reporting on it until it was too late. Wonder why that happened?
I am the founder of Raising Kings Market Place Ministry, The Pastor of Sutter Baptist Church and author of Give Real Hope. I have worked in many industries. I was the owner of a Mortgage Banking company, Real Estate Agent, Painting Contractor Company. My focus is expanding the kingdom of God. Raising Kings is the Hub for many industries: Real Estate, Humanitarian Efforts, Arts, Movies, government, Entertainment and much more. We are a marketplace ministry. We’d like to help you connect with the right industry the right people and the right resources for you to live your dream. Within Raising Kings Market Place Ministry I am currently working on promoting a New Reality TV show, Promoting Sylvester & Jennifer Stallone’s new company and expanding the kingdom of God. My vision is to empower people with tools and resources to expand the kingdom of God upon this earth. I work for God and I am here to serve you. What’s your dream? It’s all about empowering YOU with everything you need to live your DREAM. Do Rare Extraordinary Actions Mentally. Let’s talk! Let’s get connected. Let’s Give Real Hope. GIVE….Godly Investments Valued Eternally. REAL….Real Estate Asset Leveraging…..HOPE….Helping Others Prosper Economically. So let’s http://www.giverealhope.com today.
My health “insurer,” Blue Shield of California, just sent me a helpful note about anxiety.
They point out that we’re all anxious because of “recent world events,” and that’s normal.
They then go on to suggest every possible solution for mental distress that does not cost them money. Included are: homeopathy (!!!) which can “bring temporary relief.”
Also included are “Complementary and alternative health” solutions which are all very inexpensive and not covered by any insurance.
It’s a wonder they don’t just tell people to drink.
I await their instructions on setting your broken leg with reiki, wearing magnetic pants to reduce arthritis, and the magic of going overseas to get health care where they don’t have to hear about it.
Fuckers.
Favorite quote from the ad is a testimonial:
I DIG THE LUBE TUBE VIDEO LOUNGE WITH INTEGRATED CIRCLE JERK VIDCHAT
From today’s Wall Street Journal:
“The margin calls hit some chief executives who had borrowed to buy company stock. These included Chesapeake Energy Corp. Chief Executive Aubrey K. McClendon, who was forced to sell nearly his entire stake in the company, which he had accumulated in recent years, including a $43 million purchase in July. “These involuntary and unexpected sales were precipitated by the extraordinary circumstances of the world-wide financial crisis,” Mr. McClendon said in a statement. “In no way do these sales reflect my view of the company’s financial position or my view of Chesapeake’s future performance potential.””
Meet Henry T. Nicholas, local billionaire and James Bond villain. Henry was the head of Broadcom, a big microchip company. Henry stands six foot six, has a dungeon under his house, slips Ecstasy to unknowing dinner companions, does meth and coke, has a prostitution problem, has armed guards patrolling his home, and flies around in a private jet with the drugs and the prostitutes. At least, this is what the prosecutors and some angry associates say, and some of it is beyond denial, in particular the dungeon. He is also on the hook for securities fraud at his company.
Christ, what an asshole. But just look at the guy! Wow!
Details, lurid and otherwise, are in this nicely done Vanity Fair article
RESEARCHERS FIND LARGEST YET SUBPRIME NUMBER
WASHINGTON, DC (AP) — Economists working at the United States Department of Treasury and top Wall Street banks announced the historic discovery of a very large subprime number, the biggest yet seen.
The group, working in secrecy for years and using banks and real estate holdings worldwide as a laboratory, found the gigantic number some time in the last year and is only now releasing the information to the public.
“This is a win-win,” said Gary Leukotomakis, the Treasury’s Chief New Economist. “We’ve shown that subprime numbers far beyond anything previously imagined are now possible, and even likely.” Subprime numbers, which may seem esoteric to the typical American, are used in complicated financial transactions such as derivatives, credit swaps, REITs, “Jumbo loans,” nonconforming loans, and spectacular, heart-stopping international financial crises.
Thad Labbé, a senior economician at Goldman Sachs, credited new financial technologies for the breakthrough. “We had always theorized about the power of a regulatory vacuum, but when we were able to produce one in the field everything took a quantum leap,” he enthused. “Everything else we needed — weightless real estate, risk-free quantum risk, low-viscosity greed-through liquidity, and unpoppable Hyper-Bubbles — all of that stemmed from this revolutionary new postregulatory paradigm.”
“In layman’s terms,” said Labbé, “it was like free money. But forever, because it’s government science.”
Tiara Hampton, a professor of Freedom Science at the Guthy-Renker Institute for Postscientific Study, agrees. “This proves what we’ve been saying all along, what naysayers have pooh-poohed. There actually is no hard limit to a subprime number, and the actual risk to researchers is nil.” “In fact,” she remarked, “risk in this quantum environment is entirely reversed, so that it’s not possible to suffer consequences from so-called financial risk unless you’re unrelated to the experiment completely.”
Sources close to the team estimated the subprime number as nearly 700 billion, but cautioned that this number was not exact. “You have to understand,” said one source with first-hand knowledge, “that the actual number will be the product of rectal extraction for some time. The important thing is that it’s big, and bigger by a big number than the last big number.”
Spokesmen for the research group said they did not yet know what would produce the next large subprime number, but that they were confident it would be discovered in much the same way.
The research group, which until now had been working behind a veil of secrecy, was funded by the Freedom Science Foundation, the Goldman-Sachs/Treasury Revolving Door Society, and subscribers like you.
(tip o’the hat to mcbrennan for the inspiration)
This just in via email:
With summer coming to an end, it’s time to gear up for school at the Official Hives Store. Swing by now through Labor Day (September 1) and you can save 25% off everything in the store. Pick up men’s and women’s t-shirts, posters and keychains and more to get ready for all that the rest of the year brings. Pick out a new Hives hoodie now for the cooler months to come and save big! Shop the store by September 1 so you don’t miss out
A one-size-fits-all note covering all their music properties. Substitute your favorite, such as Godspeed you! Black Emperor or Anal Cunt (thanks zeb).
Ad pitches in the form “THING is happening! So buy our stuff” are by definition desperate, and seasonal appeals approach bathos. In a 30 second radio pitch you can be dragged from “Spring is almost here” to “complete garage door service only $169.95.”
Between that and being told that I’m a busy mom, I wonder how they ever sell me anything.
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