Female Trouble

There is a disease that middle-class American women get. Its symptoms are exhaustion, headache, lassitude, unexplained fevers and aches, and a depressive inability to progress. This disease has been renamed several times. At one point it was assumed to be the result of hormone problems. Other culprits have been anemia, depression, thyroid imbalance, and allergies. Some insist that American middle-class women have dietary problems. Ten or 15 years ago, a new diagnosis for these women arrived: chronic fatigue syndrome. This mysterious ailment, possibly caused by an infectious agent, fit all the symptoms, and everyone fell on it with glad cries.

Anemia, thyroid dysfunction and the rest are all real diseases, and so was CFS. But the medical and scientific world found CFS a hard sell. The earliest cases were from wealthy suburban women who get written off by doctors, because they had that disease that all of them seemed to get.

Middle-class American women had always felt tired and crappy and got mysterious diseases. When you’re making 64 cents on the dollar, expected to care for children and be an economic provider simultaneously, constantly at risk from sexual assault and domestic violence, and generally treated as a second class citizen, it’s hard to be consistently energetic. And since trying to change any of these things makes you even more of a social outcast, there aren’t a lot of solutions to your problem. Intelligent, well-educated women have good reasons to feel defeated. Any disease that gets renamed several times may well be a hidden social problem.

So, aside from the galaxy of diseases these people may have, they have excellent reasons for feeling like shit all the time and preferring to collapse and stare unhappily at the ceiling. But because of the nature of the social problem they’re facing, they get blamed for that too. Doctors prescribe tranquilizers, or iron pills, or vitamins, or just tell them they’re having female trouble.

So far, this is all a cliché. An unsolved social problem manifests as a disease and is patched over with nebulous illnesses and hypocrisy. The difference is that Chronic Fatigue Syndrome described a real disease, or perhaps several diseases. Hillary Johnson’s excellent book Osler’s Web tells the story of how difficult it was for the physicians who reported the problem to convince anyone that this wasn’t “just” the social problem or the hallucination of well-heeled ladies with issues. People with CFS couldn’t get out of bed for months at a time, found moderate exercise debilitating, felt terrible pain, and had their lives ruined for years.

So CFS was a hard sell because physicians were used to ignoring a social problem that showed up as a disease, and because the social problem itself made them more likely to write off their patients. But it gets worse.

When chronic fatigue syndrome became publicly known, everyone got it. The often renamed disease of American women had a new name, and newspaper editors ran the story like that; if you’re always tired and can’t get your shit together, here’s your diagnosis. Talk shows and popular magazines used the “epidemic” word a lot. Huge numbers of people self-diagnosed, and in fact were pretty annoying about it.

So to this day if someone says “I have CFS” people are suspicious. It’s too easy as a universal excuse for unhappy American ladies. Are you for real? Are you a malingerer, disease collector? The social problem wins over the medical one. And meanwhile, people who are actually fighting this mysterious ailment get a social stigma on top of a debilitating life-stealing ailment. Until we make some progress on the actual problems of women in our society, this pattern will repeat.

Why do I re-tell this story? Because of Asperger’s syndrome. A hilarious entry in the Encyclopedia Dramatica reminded me that it’s not just middle-class American women who need to turn their social problems into diseases; middle-class American geek guys do it too. If you don’t get along too well with people, have obsessive hobbies, do well in academics but not in life, you can now assign yourself a diagnosis rather than an epithet. There are no doubt many people with serious problems that this diagnosis fits, but there are uncountably many more people with neurotic personality issues who cling to a diagnosis.

Why do I find the E.D. entry on Asperger’s funny? Because almost none of the people who claim this disease are that badly off. They’re just geeks. The social problem they’re masking with a diagnosis is thoroughly personal.

It’s a lot worse that we’re stuck using diagnoses to solve a problem that we could have solved 25 years ago when we tragically and unaccountably failed as a national to give women equal rights under the law.

On our next episode of “Let’s Make it a Diagnosis”: the changing face of Bad Kids, or how ADHD didn’t get properly investigated for 30 years.

Private Ryan and the Skyscrapers of Fire

Hollywood flagshmerz.

Hey I got a better idea. Let’s put Jean-Claude Van Damme and Steven Seagal together in Kickboxer Under Siege: Nevar Forget 9/11. Or CGI John Wayne in a green beret into news footage and have him save the day. Or make an art film in which Bill Murray and Scarlett Johansson walk around New York philosophizing while bodies and chunks of burning crap fall around them.

Oh oh oh.. here we go. Flight 93 on Ice! Someone get Wynn on the phone this was made for Vegas…

I hate you, milkman sixteen_shells!

We’ll be way too tired after yoga and facials.

Vince Lombardi would never have cupped his hand while slapping a player’s ass. It’s really very distressing to reach for the nitro and get a bottle full of duds, especially at the doctor’s office. Could you make sure that doesn’t happen any more? She said the fish water was looking dirty so she put bleach in it, for real. He asked me if Boob Guy was gay.

I keep trying to explain her to him and he just keeps saying “she’s just STUPID! she’s just STUPID!”. He told me he needed a ride there to see his girlfriend and I just said “does your girlfriend come in a little plastic bag?”

There is another post about this which will arrive at an indeterminate time later on and is inaccurate. Then I will delete it. This is because Livejournal is a piece of shit and they broke post by email again, but it’s pointless to file a support ticket because they either already know or don’t care, and they never post anything to support or status when anything is broken either.

Today I went to the apple store because my powerbook had a case crack and a hinge fracture. The large comfortable young man at the genius bar declined to service this under applecare and insinuated that I had damaged the laptop by getting it wet and banging on it. He obviously hadn’t liked me from the start when I came in late and was anxious because I’d been removed from the repair schedule. He even pretended to go in the back and talk to “another genius” while he jacked off or had a smoke, like a fucking car salesman. Repair would cost $1000. So I got to be publicly humiliated by this son of a bitch and now if I want a working laptop I get to suck Apple’s cock and buy yet another laptop from them.

Thanks, apple! Thanks, genius bar! Thanks, applecare!

I don’t think I’ll be going back to the Newport Beach store any time soon. I haven’t wanted to hit someone this bad in a long time.

Chacon said it was belong and other with his vacational by a better use on the aviation, and adding

  1. Waaah! I can’t be in Feedster’s Top 500 blogs because I use a non-elite service. There go my dreams of joining the blogerati, crushed by this LJ ghetto. (via waxy)
  2. Writers, stop and take this handy test to make sure your character isn’t a Mary Sue. (via the null device)
  3. Today’s asciiartsfarts eye chart broke me. (foul language, no naughty pictures)