this is the way the world ends, not with a bang but a Hummer

  1. Welcome to Orange County, where being a summer reading star gets you deadly, lead-tainted toy prizes from the library!
  2. Welcome to Orange County, where a nice crab roll at Riptide Sushi fills your lungs with ravenous, deadly parasites! Edit: link fixed
  3. Welcome to Orange County, where even the [correction] guy who looks like a carnie biker to the Register, who fixes cop cars and drinks at Skosh Monahan’s thinks that the mayor of Costa Mesa is fucking shit up with his anti-Mexican pogrom.
  4. Welcome to America, where we push our children through our gigantic supermarkets in remotely managed mind control devices on wheels.
  5. Welcome to New Orleans, where a night in jail turned into the Raft of the Medusa last year.
  6. And now, welcome back to Orange County, where the richest, whitest, prettiest kids in the world will try to convert you you a religion they cannot in any meaningful way understand.

10 thoughts on “this is the way the world ends, not with a bang but a Hummer

  1. The deadly parasite story which had me most interested has the worng link. Please don’t keep me suspense! Where’s the right link?! Link me! Link me!

  2. You’ll never walk alone…
    The teams always include what Wilburn called a “wisdom person,” someone mature enough to make the decisions on what is safe for a team to do, and a “muscle person,” a guy big enough to provide protection if needed.
    …whatever happened to turning the other cheek?

  3. Wow. I read through all of the linked sites from the first piece on Alan Mansoor. The SPLC had some interesting things to say in their intelligence report. The only thing that really surprised me about their website was that they listed the Jewish Defense League as a hate group. Admittedly, I don’t know much abotu the JDL, except what they said on their webite about themselves. I searched through SPLC’s archives and I couldn’t find anything about why JDL would be a hate group. Am I missing something?
    Also, I loved the last piece. I went to a Harvest Crusade once. It was an illuminating experience. I want to hug the Saudi kids who are going to learn more English.

  4. I know Billy Folsom. He is neither biker nor carnie, but a nice local guy who is friendly even tempered. (Dead sexy too!)
    He used to fuck my crazy ex-roommate and never once expressed a desire to kill her.
    I haven’t talked to her in over a year and I still envision ending her life in a glorious rain of blood and ravaged body parts strewn across the black abyss from whence her sickly-sorry soul was born.
    Mmmm, blood. Now I’m hungry! Thanks Conrad.

    1. I’ll correct my entry; the paper made him seem like a much different person.
      mmm.. ravaged body parts. can’t you get those at a rib joint anyway?

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