Someone mentioned “voip blog” on irc and we were joking about what that meant, like maybe cold calling people to blog at them. I made some crack about getting all sorts of stereotypical blogger types (geeks, subculture victims, etc.) and telling them they’re doing VOIP blogging but actually having them do coldcall telemarketing. What to sell? Well, blogging itself! I thought we could have them sell “blogging kits” that included all kinds of useless crap and promised big profits from a home-based business. Ho ho ho. I even wrote celeb testimonial copy:
Hi. I’m Cory Doctorow. Many of you know me from my blog posts such as “Disney Dolls Again” and “Creative Commons Dog Toys”. Many of you have asked me: how can I be a Top Blogger? Well, the people at Blog Professionals Kit in a Box have a great answer.
Of course I’m way the hell behind:
You can get your very own copy of Blog In A Box right now for a Very Low Special Introductory Price of just $37 $27. This is an amazing value we are offering you. Get your hands on a BRAND NEW product that we believe will exceed our expectations with flying colors due to the increased attention blogs are getting for just a fraction of the regular price of $67. Remember that with just One Sale, Blog In A Box pays for itself! But you don’t have to stop there. Make it really work for you by selling it over and over turning it into a profit pulling machine!
Boy howdy! This is going to be even better than selling GRIT: America’s Favorite Newspaper was back in fifth grade!
Be My Blog 
So that dream I had the other night about all of us being forced to blog for a living in a corporate cubicle setting was merely a psychic premonition, then. Excellent.
Gotta go prep my Livejournal TPS report now. PROFIT PULLING MACHINE!
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That’s how Richie Rich got his start, you know.
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It sounds like it’s more of a Pyramid Scam in a Box.
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Which reminds me. I keep hearing discussions with my company execs where they discuss how we are going to add “blogs” to our site. And I keep asking what exactly does that mean, blogging on our site? And the answer I get? “Well we can’t really say yet, but we are working on a deal with a company.”
Huh? We are buying blogging? WTF?!?!?!
I still cannot get a straight answer.
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They’re probably doing a deal with Gawker Media or Weblogs, Inc. to have a blawg about your company’s area of expertise.
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