The Legend of Aquaman

He arrives in an old Suzuki Sidekick,white with pink and blue pinstripes, and strides in resplendent in a mane of dyed and teased Male Pattern Doofus, plucked eyebrows, and one of an assortment of costumes including but not limited to: captain’s hat with corncob pipe and blazer; medieval/druidic tunic and Roman strap sandals; loud blue-green aloha shirt with slacks and espadrilles; or New Age t-shirt covered in Native American imagery and/or crystal faeries.

His life is mysterious. Before Bree snapped and robbed a bank he used to talk to her a lot, but even a freaked-out Crowleyan transgendered blues singer found him too outré and would sink back into her studies of Left Hand Magick with an apologetic smile. A particular exchange I overheard one day became legendary. They were discussing movie actors and their pay, and that female stars were paid less, and he said: “Well, of course, there’s one business where the women get paid more, and that’s… [pause for effect]… [slowly and deliberately licks top teeth] poooornography.”

His nickname comes from the blue-green aloha shirt outfit, which looks like an aquarium just exploded on him.

I present to you a genuine California eccentric:

It's aquaman!

Wide Angle aquaman

5 thoughts on “The Legend of Aquaman

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