How to destroy a company with Management Techniques and Excel.
There’s a version of the American Dream that consists of building a successful company and then walking away with the money to drink umbrella drinks while morons destroy it. It’s my favorite version because it’s so reliable. I have worked for that company no less than three times. The interesting thing to me is not that a standard version of Asshole Capitalism happens, because I learned about that in Econ 101. The cool part is that every company I’ve seen do this failed horribly afterwards. Sometimes the Invisible Hand is just wanking.
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Idle wanking hands
I like that
“Sometimes the Invisible Hand is just wanking.”
That one is going up on the post-it wall.
Cheers!
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Whoa… I worked there also. And I’m not even counting the place where I didn’t work 😀
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substitute++ Invisible Hand.
I want to learn more about Asshole Capitalism. Considering that all the money is made by people paying attention to customers, where do the Assholes get the capital in the first place?
Theory: even more successful firms that became cancerous due to the founders leaving. Asshole firms merge to provide the illusion of economic activity, thus grow like a tumor, eating up other companies until they finally fail, maybe a decade later.
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Mid Size company = modest profits
mid Size company + cost savings/reorganization/downsizing/merging = big short term profits = venture capitalist chubbies. Hence, you get plenty of people interested in capital investment so that the short term profits + venture capitalist financing generate enough cash to buy another company. Rinse and repeat.
This is how WorldCom did it.
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I think we have all worked for this company at some time.
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ABC
PUT THAT COFFEE DOWN. Coffee is for closers.
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