By the time I get to Arizona

The nation’s best state for heavily armed racist wack jobs produces an armed terrorist group; government is going to “monitor” them. I’m sure they’ll follow instructions and only offer food and water to lost illegal immigrants, though. It’s not like any of them are hate-filled crackers itching for a chance at legalized lynching or anything. BAD IDEA JEANS

3 thoughts on “By the time I get to Arizona

    1. Lovecraft, Arizona
      When I lived in Albuquerque, I found that New Mexicans so recoiled in terror from basically every bordering state that their mental model of things was: What states does New Mexico border? Colorado.
      And a bit of Oklahoma.
      And okay, if you drove for like a day, you could get to where New Mexico borders “Old Mexico”.
      And that’s all that New Mexico borders.
      Now, New Mexico is a square, but as to the east and west sides, it was like the oddly blank unshaded unlabelled parts on a medieval map — that’s just where space stops existing, don’t look there, it’s a singularity and we do not discuss that.
      That’s how they un-thought of Arizona, Utah, and Texas.
      So, to Arizona and Texas, I say: when New Mexico, a dessicated lunar landscape of craters, radioactivity, meth-labs, and flailing grifters, looks down on you, it’s time to wonder what you’re doing wrong.

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