Terror couple kill colonel

We had a real dust-up in my neighborhood today. The usual unreliable handyman tied up wealthy doctor and her personal assistant and was I guess ransacking the place. P.A., who had been hit on the head with a HAMMER, escaped and summoned the constabulary who rescued the lady neurologist from her house, which was now burning. Moriarty escaped on foot down into the Upper Bay, in which he probably swam briskly off to his underground base on Catalina Island or something.

And now, another 35 years of quiet.

Amazing the cops didn’t catch the guy, considering the rather upfront nature of the crime. Maybe he’ll be the D.B. Cooper of Newport Beach and never be found. I was a bit frightened for my mom since this whole mess occurred less than a mile from her house and really the last thing she needs is a charred, murderous handyman crashing into the parlour pursued by bloodhounds.

4 thoughts on “Terror couple kill colonel

  1. On my way home, at 22nd and Tustin, I saw about 15 or so police walking down the middle of the street with some very scary looking guns, the sherrifs had the biggest. A handful of Newport Beach housewifes followed them excitedly.
    Thanks for filling us in, we were a tad curious.

      1. Well, that’s ’cause you don’t live at that hotbed of activity, the Airtel Plaza Hotel in Van Nuys. 🙂
        And now that I think of it, given that I live in NYC, you’d think more would happen around my neighborhood, too.

Leave a Reply

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.