Do not lambada in the orrery

I’d RATHER be SAILING the SEVENTY SEAS with my PIRATE PARROT on my SHOULDER. But, I’m a sysadmin so I’m going to be online at “10 ish” when the NCAA game ends to update my employer’s website so the box scores don’t look retarded.

I’d RATHER be ROLLING in the HAY with LUSCIOUS SUPERMUDDLES but I’m a sysadmin, so I’ll hang out with my friends at a coffee house for a bit until the annoying AA people show up, and then go home and make some bread before the NCAA game ends.

I’d RATHER be FLYING my HYPERSONIC SPACE PLANE from DUBAI to SWARGFISKERATORAN via CHAMONIX but I’m a sysadmin so I’ll be buzzing down the 405 in my japanese sports car trying to avoid assmonkeys in huge SUVs who pass on the shoulder at 80 and then merge in to gain 8 car lengths and nearly kill me.

On the latter topic it’s a really fucking good thing that I don’t carrry a gun in the car..

..because a good windshield-penetrating, manstopper hollowpoint round costs a lot of money these days.