Latent Periscopic Embolism

I was driving home tonight on the freeway and extremely bored. So bored, that I actually listened to two Styx songs in a row on the radio, and I hate Styx a lot.

Then an ad came on the radio. A woman was talking to something with a comical cartoony little voice. Soon it became apparent that she was talking to some type of feminine hygiene product, because the cartoony little voice said “I can help with vaginitis, too!” Together, she and the product were plotting something. Then she said “Hush, he’s coming!”

Then her husband enters the playlet and she tells them they have something special planned tonight. The cartoony feminine hygiene product pipes up and the three of them have a conversation about how they’re not going to use a condom tonight, but instead going to use Buffergel, the new gel that somehow protects against something: whether it’s HIV or pregnancy is not made clear in the ad.

Finally, the announcer comes on and tells you that Buffergel is only available on a testing basis and they want “loving couples” to call them to get some money and free Buffergel.

So it was just basically your usual threesome/cartoon voice/feminine hygiene/sex aid/research study ad.

I really have nothing further to say. Except EXTERMINATE THE BRUTES

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