Tag: orangecounty

I’M DYIN’ OUT HERE. THIS IS THE WORST FUCKING THING. YOU HAVE TO HELP ME. FUCK.

I was just awakened from a lovely nap by lost bro guys. There were two of them, the Shouter and the Mumbler. The Shouter was on his phone and alternately talking to the Mumbler.

SHOUTER: AN HOUR AGO WE WERE AT THE BAR AND NOW WE’RE IN THE MIDDLE OF FUCKING NOWHERE!!

MUMBLER: Urghm… [inaudible]

SHOUTER: WHAT THE FUCK, I CAN’T FUCKING BELIEVE THIS IS HAPPENING TO ME! NO, I’M AT HARMONY AND BAGUETTE! NO! GET THE COMPUTER!

MUMBLER: grghgm…

SHOUTER: SHUT THE FUCK UP! NO! I DON’T KNOW. I WALKED THE WHOLE WAY. YOU GOTTA HELP ME. COME ON. FUCKIN’. THIS IS FUCKING NOWHERE.

SHOUTER: FUCK FUCK, FUCK, FUCK FUCK FUCK! HOW DID THIS EVEN HAPPEN? YES I SAID HARMONY AND BAGUETTE. NO I DON’T KNOW. YOU TELL ME WHICH WAY! LEFT OR RIGHT? I’M FACING… FUCK JUST TELL ME HOW TO GET OUT OF HERE!!!

This went on for about fifteen minutes. For reference, I’m a half mile from the boulevard where any bar would be, and if you look down “Harmony” you can see a major thoroughfare at each end within a few minutes’ walking distance. Shouter was degenerating into a meltdown panic as if he’d fallen into an abandoned mineshaft or been left behind by the last chopper out of a firefight in Afghanistan. Periodically he attempted to hail some passing car. Oh dear god don’t leave the poor boy here in this suburban neighborhood that’s laid out in a grid. Some soccer mom will skin him alive for a laugh or he’ll be mauled and eaten by wandering housecats.

Finally I went out to either help him find his way out of our living Hell or get him to shut up. He was headed in the right direction, though, and he and Mumbler slowly flapped in their flip-flops towards the twinkling lights of the Oasis called Newport Boulevard.

SHOUTER: YEAH, BUT WHAT WAS FUNNY IS HOW MUCH WE RIPPED HIM OFF!!

MUMBLER: shut the fuck up

SHOUTER: WE GOT HIS NINETY BUCKS AND THERE’S NO WAY HE GOT HIS MONEY’S WORTH! HAHAHAHAHAH!

Costa Mesa History X

Allan Mansoor is Costa Mesa’s David Duke, their Jorg Haider. He’s a smooth, well-groomed, and unctuously multisyllabic racist. He presents his anti-Mexican program as a combination of respect for law and preservation of the city’s prosperity.

Behind every smiling frontman like Mansoor, though, there’s an oaf with a club. In this case it’s Martin H. Millard, a Neo-Nazi white supremacist of the familiar type: paranoid, ignorant, obsessed with racial purity, and self-published. He’s a nut, and a dangerous one.

And behind Millard is an even scarier group: violent white supremacist gangs, who mix racial violence in with their drug deals and auto theft. Guys like the one who beat up a black guy in a wheelchair outside a Circle K last month for no particular reason.

Millard and Allan are good buddies, and the same goes for Minuteman Jim Gilchrist. Mansoor turns a blind eye to Millard’s race-mix paranoia and Gilchrist’s illegal vigilantes, and they all pretend to be law-abiding citizens and deplore street crime, which is of course an “immigrant” problem.

Costa Mesans, do not be fooled. Mansoor’s buddies aren’t just making you cringe with their crackpot racist screeds. They’re also hotwiring your car, selling speed to your kid, and doing drive-by shootings. Costa Mesa is a practical capitalist town for small businessmen. Whatever else you guys need from your city government, you need the rule of law, not a lawless ideology.

Dump your mayor. He’s no friend to anyone but pathetic Nazi losers and their thug crew.

SO I’VE BEEN BROWSING MYSPACE TONIGHT

I’VE FOUND OUT A LOT OF STUFF, OKAY.

FIRST OF ALL I CAN GET UPSCALE ACCESS TO PROMOTIONAL EVENTS AND PARTIES THROUGH UPSCALE ACCESS BECAUSE THEY ARE MY HOOKUP TO THE SCENE. THE SCENE IS WHERE YOU TO TO RESTAURANTS HERE IN TOWN AND PAY EXTRA AND THERE ARE DRUNK BLONDE WOMEN THERE WITH SPRAY ON TANS. THE MEMBERSHIP IN UPSCALE ACCESS IS SO EXCITING TO THESE WOMEN THAT QUITE A FEW OF THEM ARE SEEN LICKING THE MEMBERSHIP CARDS OR STROKING THEIR CLEAVAGE WITH THE CARDS AND SEEM VERY HAPPY DOING THIS. I AM NOT SURE HOW THIS IS DIFFERENT FROM JUST GOING TO A RESTAURANT AND HAVING SOME SEX AFTERWARDS BUT I GUESS IT’S PRETTY GOOD.

I ALSO LEARNED THAT THE MAJORITY OF NEW MYSPACE MEMBERS TONIGHT ARE YOUNG WOMEN WHO HAVE JUST GRADUATED FROM HIGH SCHOOL AND WANT TO MEET FUN PEOPLE BECAUSE THEY’RE NEW IN TOWN. WHAT’S WEIRD IS THAT THEY ALL LOOK LIKE 30-YEAR-OLD PROFESSIONAL BIKINI MODELS. MAYBE HIGH SCHOOL IS DIFFERENT NOW, I DUNNO.

I LEARNED THAT SOME GUY FOR REASONS OF HIS OWN IS MAKING PROFILES FOR THE ENTIRE 1995 GRADUATING CLASS OF CORONA DEL MAR HIGH SCHOOL WITH THE REAL NAMES AND PICTURES OF THOSE PEOPLE PROBABLY WITHOUT TALKING TO THEM FIRST. THAT’S GOING TO BE A PARTY BECAUSE THEY’RE ALL ABOUT THE AGE TO BE GRADUATING FROM LAW SCHOOL ABOUT NOW AND I THINK MAYBE THEY WON’T LIKE THIS SO MUCH.

OH AND ONE OTHER THING THERE IS SOMETHING CALLED ULTRA LOUNGE NOW. IT LOOKS LIKE A REGULAR DISCO EXCEPT IT HAS TECHNO MUSIC ON A LOOP AND THE DRINKS ARE TEN DOLLARS. I AM NOT SURE WHY IT’S AN ULTRA LOUNGE BECAUSE THE PICTURES ARE JUST OF DRUNK PEOPLE OR BOOTH BABES FROM THE TRADE SHOW IN MINIDRESSES BUT MAYBE THERE ARE SOME REALLY GOOD LOUNGE TYPE CHAIRS IN THE PLACE THAT ARE SUPER COMFORTABLE.

IT WAS REALLY TIRING READING ABOUT THE ULTRA LOUNGES AND THE BIKINI MODELS AND ALL THE ENERGY DRINKS AND PROMOTIONS AND STUFF. I THINK THESE PEOPLE MUST BE A LOT MORE COMMITTED TO AN UPSCALE LIFESTYLE THAN I AM BECAUSE IT SORT OF WORE ME OUT JUST LEARNING ALL THIS NEW STUFF.

ALSO WHEN I WAS BROWSING THROUGH THE PEOPLE ON MYSPACE I SAW THIS IN THE MIDDLE OF A BUNCH OF THOSE 30 YEAR OLD BIKINI MODELS WHO JUST GRADUATED HIGH SCHOOL:

The new chain restaurant is here! The new chain restaurant is here!

The huge restaurant chain that owns Outback, Fleming’s, and various other Tchotchke’s/Flingers type places has brought their expensive seafood joint here, “”Blue Coral.” Best quote from the Register article is:

That was evident Tuesday night, as diners such as Stafford – clad in khaki shorts, an Oxford shirt and a Crevier BMW cap – admired Blue Coral’s high-back booth seats, iridescent-blue mosaic tiles and teak floors. The Fleming’s regular said he plans to cruise among Roy’s, Fleming’s and Blue Coral on a weekly basis.

“This is what Newport Beach is all about,” Stafford said.

Um. No. Newport beach is all about the Crab Cooker, the Villa Nova, Dad’s Donuts, the Blue Beet, and Original Pizza. Among others. There’s an actual town here and we don’t need any more chain restaurants for the guys in polo shirts and pressed khaki shorts and pressed executive hair.

I bet he has a Duffy electric boat, too. Snark. 😀

The full article is interesting, especially in the detail that America’s shitty chain restaurants are getting their profits ground to bits by high energy costs.

CHRIST, WHAT AN ASSHOLE

Someone decided to get really, really high and shoot at people in an alley over off Baker & Fairview in Costa Mesa the other day. Killed one guy, hurt a few others. The victims appear to be nice local boys without any known criminal connections. Everyone involved was of Mexican ancestry. Everyone who knew the victims is shocked and saddened; there are little memorials on the street and the people at the surf shop where the dead guy worked are really down. It’s a bad day for the city and for my city, too; we’re so close. But here’s what Costa Mesa’s crypto-Nazi Mayor had to say:

“When you have job centers, soup kitchens and a high concentration of downscale rental units, it drives the city down,” Mayor Allan Mansoor said. “I favor a multi-faceted approach including stronger gang enforcement and overlay zone revitalization, and I also think a social worker holding the hand of a hardened gang member has not worked in other cities.”

Allan, it’s time to go. Maybe rural Arizona would be good for you, or that Pennsylvania town that just passed the “no Mexicans allowed” law. Running the Mexicans and the poor out of town is a solution to a problem no one has but you. What we wanted to hear was “Murder is the most serious of crimes and we’re lucky it’s rare here in Costa Mesa. We will bring these guys to justice and we will all work together for a safer city.” Just in case you have a pen handy, you might want to write that down.

And while we’re at it, I’ve been looking over the manifest for the Mayflower here and I see Smith and Standish and Johnson and Grey… Mansoor? No, no Mansoor. How odd. I was just reading the other day about how people with names like “Mansoor” are involved in all sorts of terroristical activities. Maybe we need to overlay zone revitalize about that.

http://www.dailypilot.com/articles/2006/08/04/publicsafety/dpt-shooting04.txt

http://www.ocregister.com/ocregister/homepage/abox/article_1233749.php

Neotenized homogeneous privilege results in frenetic subculture self-identification. Also retards.

I thank burntcurtis for the phrase “White Identity” to describe Orange County’s many fucked-up subcultures: goth, skinhead, mod, swing kid, straightedge, rockabilly greaser, emo, “punk,” neo-hippie, club kid, etc. Until he pointed it out I hadn’t seen our collection of permanent teenage culture victims as a consequence of overwhelming whiteness, but it sure makes sense.

I was reminded of that this morning when it was brought to my attention that a skinhead had figured out how to work a computer.

Welcome back to the human race

I’m warming up to Ruba. There’s no where else to go that late, so this is a good thing. This evening’s entertainment included some personal history about being a Marine and a felon simultaneously and how that worked out, someone’s idiotic $500 plastic sunglasses, and a guy named Bilbo who wore too much fringed stuff and a mullet.

Now here’s the good news: Panera’s putting in a location on 17th, apparently in the former Rite-Aid. Hurray for the imminent arrival of good free wifi, lots of power plugs, decent coffee, and food.

I was listening to “Sultans of Swing” on the radio in my car and realizing that what I like about that song is the bassline, although it’s supposed to be a Guitar Asshole Song.

Finally, the National Weather Service agrees that our weather has been all fucked-up:

The heat that scorched Southern California this past weekend was not only record breaking…but largely unprecedented in recorded history. Strong high pressure centered over the southwest United States sent easterly flow and strong sinking and compressing motion into Southern California that maximized the heating. Monsoon moisture also contributed to the heat by keeping the minimum temperatures up…and numerous daily high minimum temperature records were also broken for much of the last week.

Several high temperature records on Saturday were the all-time highest for the entire period of record (see details below). This is particularly remarkable in Escondido since the record dates back to 1900. At San Diego Lindbergh Field the temperature peaked at 99 degrees…becoming the hottest day since September 25 1989…which is still the last 100-degree day on record.

Also remarkable for areas near the coast was the time of year for this extreme heat since several daily records were not just broken…but shattered (by 16 degrees in Escondido!). normally onshore flow with a marine air presence dominates the weather near the coast at this time of year…so record high temperatures are not as high as they are during the late Summer and early fall…when Santa Ana conditions are usually the cause of high temperature records and are more likely to occur.

I can’t talk to her. She’s against shit she can’t even pronounce.

The Midnight Van

After last night’s fun, I went to bed at 6 am and slept until 2. The rest of the day was… slow. Fortunately nothing else broke at work. I was bummed at missing Nicole’s wedding, but there was no way that mission could have been accomplished without loss of life.

I finally dragged myself out of the house after dark and bought food, etc. I ended up at Ruba, which was full of weird ghosts of ten years ago. I don’t think I’d seen Sabrina since Indian Burial Ground Night at Totally Coffee. She didn’t acknowledge my existence, for which I am grateful.

Choice “Overheard at Ruba™” quotes:

“I live the same place she does. She has a nice rack. It’s been okay.”

“Oh, that Dennys. One of my best friends got busted for selling drugs to a minor there! It was awesome.”

“You and I have a lot the same background, but you’re good-looking.”

“You know her. She’s the racist secretary.”

“I know it was illegal before, I asked you how old is she NOW?”

“No, man, I can’t afford any tools. I just do shit to shit, you know?”

Ahh, Ruba.

It was 80 degrees F here at midnight with humidity around 50%. In coastal Orange County. I do not understand.