An email from Kazakhkstan leads to coffee in Newport

Tom at Kéan Coffee

Saw Tom today, for the first time in more than 20 years. I went to high school with him and I think saw him once after that. In the meantime he’s had a few careers and is currently fully employed saving the world. This is a damned good thing in that the world is in need of saving and Tom is both smart and on the side of the angels.

I tried to explain some of the more recent features of our locale including Mortgage Bro ‘n’ Ho Culture, the Vanguard Nice Christian Kid Death Star Attack, and the deadly affluenza of drugs and alcohol among the Kids These Days. Not sure if I was sufficiently descriptive.

I went away with the happy feeling of having reconnected, some good stories from both of us, and a sticker that says COALITION CONVOY / STAY BACK 50 METERS / DEADLY FORCE IS AUTHORIZED in English and Arabic. I think that is going to go on the laptop. I’ll leave the rest of the storytelling to him, if he chooses to tell the stories.

On the way over there I was listening to Indie 103 (which I’m liking more and more) and it was Steve Jones’ show. It was a crazy reunion show at that because Jonesy had John Lydon on the show and they were bullshitting and laughing about the Sex Pistols days. Best quote was from Lydon: “And we were very confused, as one ought to be.”

Anyway they wrapped up the show as I was driving from the shrink’s office to meet Tom at Kéan. Just as I drove past my alma mater, all decorated with happy cheerleader girls doing the splits, the radio spat out “God Save the Queen” and I realized that this was something like my 25th anniversary of driving past that high school blasting that song on my car radio.

As Tom said, “that still works.”


My favorite insane cult from the 1980s is the CHURCH UNIVERSAL AND TRIUMPHANT, led by Elizabeth Clare Prophet. Her books were in the weirdo section and I was always fascinated. There was something about St. Germain, and new Christian prophecies, and aliens, and everything.

Like everyone else they had a compound. Theirs was by Yellowstone and they stockpiled weapons waiting for the inevitable pseudo-Christian apocalyptic disaster.

Ms. Prophet had a unique preaching style, and fortunately a recording of one service at least survives. This is from my 20th birthday! Many of you will have heard one of these tracks (“invocation for Judgement”) because it’s an attack on rock music that lists a long series of popular bands in 1984 that must be destroyed, and are comically mispronounced (Cindy Looper, etc.).

Decree 12.10 is only for completists, as it’s basically 27:57 of deranged cattle auctioneer/martian hoedown/speaking in tongues. The others are great though. If you just get one, get #4, the Great Divine Rector’s Call. Please download rather than streaming, and mirror if you want to share.

The Sounds of American Doomsday Cults: The Church Universal and Triumphant

  1. Dedication To The Tackling Of The Beast And The Dragon — The Momentum Of Rock’n’roll
  2. Call For Protection
  3. Video Shorts With Two Announcements (Excerpt)
  4. Preamble — Great Divine Rector’s Call
  5. Invocation For Judgement Against And Destruction Of Rock Music
  6. Decree 12.10
  7. Decree 10.05