The Suit

I need to buy a suit, since I don’t have one. The next wedding, funeral, job interview, or trial I’m involved in will demand it. Ideally I’ll get married, go on a job interview and be turned down, come home and murder my wife in a bizarre psychotic reaction to failure, and be tried for the crime, and the suit will pay for itself.

I know friendly_bandit had good luck at Robinsons-May. Are there other recommendations for suit purchasing in Southern California, preferably in Orange County?

I’m going to buy the “all purpose dark suit” this time and it should be as near to all-weather as possible. No white sharkskin, seersucker, or heavy heavy wool.

MEAT HELMET

I SAID: MEAT HELMET.

Pneumatic ‘air muscles’ control the helmet, forcing the user to eat at intervals specified by a CPU located on a belt. The on-board program sends out commands to an electronic valve, which controls the supply of compressed air to the air muscles. A keypad allows the user to punch-in the amount of calories about to be consumed (Big Mac = 560), where the program will calculate how many chews are needed to burn them off (chewing = 70 calories/hour), commencing the forced-chewing upon the user (8 hour workout!).