WEEKEND UPDATE

A 12-year-old kid got killed trying to lift a 185-pound barbell weight in his garage because he wanted to be a football star. Two Brazilian guys got busted at odradak‘s old motel for kidnapping immigrants. We have to vote for a very right-wing Republican in the special election to keep the nutcase racist co-founder of the Minutemen from being elected, because the Democrat has no chance.

A guy who used to be the city manager of Hawthorne, CA was shot dead by the cops in Riverside after he pulled a shotgun on them. Why’d he do that?

“He was a drinker and things that would perhaps not necessarily be significant to you and me were really big deals to him,” said Riverside police Sgt. Leon Phillips. “Someone stole his pressure washer from his driveway and his car was rear-ended. That was the context of his day.”

Okay I’ve had enough. Next post will be more interesting and hopefully less grim!

It just wouldn’t be the holidays

…without grim film noir news from Downtown Los Angeles. Of course the story doesn’t point out that the reason all the “services” for indigent people are in Skid Row is to keep them bottled up there, in one of the world’s most dangerous square miles. I used to talk to homeless guys downtown who wouldn’t go to the missions because they thought they might not make it through the murderers, stuff on fire, other murderers, etc.

Hospitals send patients to L.A.’s skid row

LOS ANGELES (AP) — Three hospitals acknowledged putting discharged patients with nowhere else to go into taxicabs heading to the city’s downtown skid row, the Los Angeles Times reported.

Representatives of Hollywood Presbyterian Medical Center, Kaiser Permanente West Los Angeles and Martin Luther King Jr./Drew Medical Center said they were helping patients because skid row offers their best chance of getting services and shelter. They said patients are sent to skid row only if they are healthy enough.

“One of the challenges is that there are very few places that will take patients coming out of the hospital, even when they are medically cleared,” said Mehera Christian, a spokeswoman for Kaiser Permanente Metro Los Angeles. “There are just a scarce number of places in the community to assist our homeless.”

The hospitals were the first to acknowledge delivering people to skid row. A Los Angeles Police Department report had accused the three hospitals and several suburban law enforcement agencies of leaving homeless people and criminals downtown. The suburban departments deny the accusation.

LAPD officials agreed that the hospitals have few other choices, but said the practice only adds to grim conditions on skid row. They disputed the hospitals’ assertion that the patients were always ready for release.

Earlier this week, city and state officials pledged a new fight against problems in the neighborhood, including drug dealing that police say generates roughly one-fifth of the city’s drug arrests.

Officials at the three hospitals said they don’t simply dump the patients.

Hospital social workers usually meet with patients to try to connect them with agencies or groups that could help them, then provide them transportation, Christian said. She said about half of patients say where they want to go, and none are forcibly taken anywhere.

Joseph Epps, an attorney for Hollywood Presbyterian, said hospital policy calls for homeless and indigent patients to be transported by hospital van to the Los Angeles Mission on skid row or to receive taxi vouchers to go wherever they want.

LAPD Capt. Andy Smith said patients don’t always reach their destinations, and that he often sees “individuals with not one but sometimes two different hospital bracelets, and people with bandages on, people who are barely ambulatory, and we’ll end up calling an ambulance. Sometimes they are in such bad shape they are incoherent.”

LAPD Assistant Chief George Gascon said services should be spread across the area so skid row doesn’t bear too much of the load.

Memorable musical experiences: a list

A list of live shows that (good or bad) were unforgettable.

  • Los Lobos at the Wiltern in Los Angeles, New Year’s Eve. I think 1986? 1987? I’m bad at years. Holy crap that was an awesome show. They’re one of the best live bands in the world, and they were at their best that night. Los Lobos can stand completely still on stage concentrating on their music and make five thousand people dance like maniacs.
  • The Minutemen at the Anti-Club, Los Angeles, July 1985. I think I sweated out and replaced my entire liquid volume. They played one of their classic tight tight fast fast sets. D. Boon was the flying fat man, like a blurry Sta-Puft dude with a guitar. Mike Watt’s bass was coming from inside me. They closed with “Substitute”, my favorite Who song. I remember walking out afterwards into the cool air realizing how wet with sweat I was and how happy.
  • The Toy Dolls at the Concert Factory, Costa Mesa, 1984. I think this was the first time I saw a punk show indoors at night in a real nightclub. I still can’t believe how tight and fast and hilariously fun they were. Olga didn’t touch the ground for 90 minutes straight. The crowd was slamdancing but in that cooperative, friendly OC Punk way where anyone who fell down got picked up and everyone was just having a great time. My ears rang for two days. I was hooked.
  • The Academy of St. Martin in the Fields, at their namesake church, London, 1980. This is where I fell in love with baroque symphonic music. They did a lot of Bach that day. It was partly a memorial service for a cellist of theirs who had recently died, and they did several pieces from The Art Of The Fugue, which is a favorite of mine, and their version is my favorite. It ends poignantly with his playing, since that piece was never finished. I can still see this entire concert in my head like a film.
  • Pre Turkey Blowout, just before Thanksgiving, Stardust Ballroom, Los Angeles. This was one of those cattle call 5 punk bands for $8 things. The headliner was Samhain, which was Glenn Danzig’s thing between the Misfits and Danzig. I went with my friend Dan because he was a Misfits fan. Because the show was billed as a Pre Turkey Blowout, some genius had bought a bunch of turkeys and hacked them up and thrown them around on the floor, so there were chunks of bird lying around. While Dan and I were waiting for things to start, a huge spherical skinhead guy walked by, stepped on turkey guts, and fell on his ass. We had to run away because we were laughing so hard we thought he’d kill us. The actual show was horrible. I couldn’t stand Samhain, the sound was muddy, it was boring and loud, and I wanted to go home. They did look cool though. I saw the video of this same exact show for sale at Tower last week and laughed.
  • 54.40 at Club Lingerie, Los Angeles, 1986. They’d just put out a new album and the song “Baby Ran Away” was doing well. I knew I liked the songs, and they had a really different sound from a lot of white-guy-with-guitar bands. I wasn’t prepared for how fucking awesome they would be. I was already excited just watching the setup because everyone clearly knew what they were doing, and that usually means good music. But they had such incredible performer charisma. That club was a real scenester asshole joint, where no one would admit they really enjoyed the music and everyone hung out in back sipping drinks and networking. But the band came out and hit it really hard and tight and well, and just as they were getting us all really interested the singer came on stage and just held up his hands in a welcoming gesture and picked up the mike and I swear every detached, ironic, cynical insider in the room just rushed the stage and went nuts. We were all singing along and dancing and looking at each other like WOW THIS IS GREAT the whole time. Oddly, that same record has “I go blind” on it, which Hootie covered to great effect a decade later. Can’t stand Hootie but glad those guys got paid.
  • The Dream Syndicate, Safari Sam’s, Huntington Beach, 1985. Holy shit they were on that night. Somehow they could have not a note out of place and still sound raw and unfiltered. They seared my face off with noise and I couldn’t stop jumping up and down and singing along. I especially remember their cover of “Cinnamon Girl” that night, which they also recorded later in the studio where it sounded flat. Paul Cutler became my guitar hero forever that night.
  • Tones on Tail, The Music Machine, Los Angeles, 1984. This was the only tour this group did to my knowledge. It was a post Bauhaus but pre Love & Rockets band with Daniel Ash and Kevin whassisname the Bauhaus drummer, with a bassist and lots of electronics. I’d never seen an E-Bow used before, or been to a show where a 4-track was used to such great effect. It was magical. Ash is a fine guitar player and very inventive, and they were all such experienced musicians that the weird little noises and effects came out clear as day.
  • Agent Orange and the Brat, The Music Machine, 1984. I saw Agent Orange a few times at this club. They were the loudest fucking punkass fucking punk band in fucking punkass loud punkland. Loads of fun and perfect for me at 19. Every time we went there, sadly, someone had some horribly shitty luck, but it was worth it. The Brat totally blew me away, too. They were an east L.A. punk band with an incredibly charismatic and hot lead singer. I remember them playing “High School” and everyone skanking like crazy. “Didn’t learn a fucking thing / Didn’t buy the goddamn ring”.
  • R.E.M. + Natalie Merchant + a whole load of other people I don’t remember, McCabe’s Guitar Shop, Santa Monica, 1986 or 87. This was on the tour for Document which I still think was their height. They did a benefit for Texas Records, a local label and store, whose owner was Stipe’s lover at the time. It was one of those semi unannounced things. It was a kind of all star post punk jam. Natalie Merchant wasn’t yet annoying in those days, and Stipe’s voice was beautiful. My friend Geoff played guitar on “The One I Love” and that version ended up on a 12 inch import. The whole thing closed with a group cover of Gang of Four’s “Damaged Goods” which is kind of the “Knockin’ on Heaven’s Door” of post-punk kids. Magic evening.
  • T-Bone Burnett Christmas show, McCabe’s, 1989? 1990? T-Bone did a variety show over three or four days there which was broadcast on NPR. I saw one night of it. The night I saw he brought in Booker T., Jeff Bridges, Edgar Meyer, Jerry Douglas, Al Kooper, Joe Henry, others I can’t recall just now. Booker T. did an amazing acoustic version of “Dock of the Bay”. Jeff Bridges did some piano reminiscent of his Baker Boys stuff, and then got out a ukulele and sang “The Sunny Side of the Street”. Joe Henry did “A Short Man’s Room”. They did a fair amount of Christmas music. McCabe’s is a no-alcohol venue where you sit on folding chairs in a guitar storage room, and there are tea and cookies at intermission. That plus T-Bone’s friendly presence made it feel like we were all in his living room and various geniuses were just wandering in to pick a tune or two. This show is one of my Happy Places to go back to.
  • Sonic Youth, The Meat Puppets, Psi-Com, Redd Kross, White Flag, way the hell out in the desert past Victorville, January or February 1985? 1984?. “Desolation Productions” put on these things without permits out in the middle of nowhere. This one was around the time Sonic Youth put out Bad Moon Rising, so the desert setting was perfect. It was a night show and it got cold as hell quickly. I think almost everyone there but me was on acid, since most people came by bus where that was the thing. There were worrisome events around the bonfire but no one was injured. The Meat Puppets played totally wrapped up in winter clothing with only their mouths and eyes showing. Sonic Youth was perfect. I remember Lee Ranaldo with an acoustic guitar he’d stuffed a pickup into, running towards the amp to get feedback and then running away again, and you couldn’t see him when he ran away because it was too dark. Death Valley ’69 indeed.
  • Savage Republic, downtown Los Angeles somewhere, 1985. This was Bruce Licher’s wedding and a special show, and you got a neat shirt (I lost mine) if you went, etc. The awesome and bizarre neo-surf band Lawndale opened. It was in one of those classic art space warehouse things in the industrial part of downtown. Savage Republic live is this mix of Joy Division ish guitar and loud clanking sounds and yelling and Eastern rhythms and surf sound that is unique. And Bruce, one of my musical heroes, got married! So totally awesome.

Okay I’m going to do more of these some other time, out of space.

soaking my bandanna while I stir

Successfully prepared the meal, which was: a 14 lb turkey, bread dressing, green beans, cornbread, gravy, cranberry sauce. Generally a success, with the following exceptions:

  1. Meat thermometer didn’t go in the right place, registered finished temperature too soon. Had to wing it by time.
  2. When your circuit breaker trips while the rice machine is making rice, it doesn’t recover. Despite having COMPUTAR MACHEIN in it that knows exactly when the rice is done, if it loses its place it refuses to continue when power is restored. Since the rice is now in an indeterminate state you’ve just ruined one load of rice. Suck.
  3. Wine spill just as we were starting.
  4. Forgot to serve cranberry sauce. Will eat it tomorrow.

All the food turned out perfectly, though. And I only yelled “FUCK!” once (#2).

Also, blueberry pie from local bakery (Sunflour).

Since I modified my diet to avoid death, two servings is a lot, so I was able to enjoy the meal without the crazed gluttony problem. Cooked about the right amount of food, too, so leftovers but not waste. With the exception of the rice. FUCK!

Cooking exhausts me, but pleasantly. I like making everything from scratch.

grumpsgiving

  1. When, exactly, would you need USB powered warmed slippers? If you have no way to power slippers, won’t your laptop battery die in 20 minutes heating your feet? I guess if you have only one power plug and the computer’s plugged into it, and it’s cold, because it’s night and you’re at the office and they don’t turn the heat on, and. Oh well. Japan is weird.
  2. The Aetheronomy (?) people don’t like Wikipedia very much. This page is worth it just for the illustration, but the psychoceramica is also amazing.
  3. In other net kook news, Jeff Eaton covers a shocking abuse of the media so well I chorfed my coffee.
  4. Effect Measure points out that quarantines and restrictive measures are pointless if something like bird flu goes into human-to-human pandemic mode.
  5. The Truck Muscle Asshole thing is over. OVER. PLEASE? No, they’re still doing this stupid shit. We’re going to Dude Ranch ourselves into the fucking Apocalypse.

It’s a doll that screams nonstop in Arabic when you pull its string!

Tonight I was talking to this guy Matt I recently met about hard times and substance abuse, and we were agreeing that neither of us liked bars that much unless there was live music to make it worthwhile, and that drunk people were mostly a drag.

This woman Danielle I don’t know too well and IndieGirl I talk to sometimes whose name I have never got straight suddenly thundered in and sat down with us. IndieGirl was hammered. She’s always an entertaining high-speed talker. After drinking all day she’s a loud, random, entertaining, high-speed talker. She had kissed the bartender at the last bar and was celebrating and/or agonizing over this fact. I made fun of her a little bit but she didn’t mind. Meanwhile Danielle was explaining to me that her fortysomething boyfriend (she’s an undergrad) wasn’t the same one as before, and that she had traded the previous fortysomething boyfriend with kids in for a new one.

IndieGirl’s phone rang and it was the bartender, who of course wanted to meet her after work. At this point it was 8 pm and she was so drunk that she kept repeating GOD I AM SO DRUNK! until I was repeating it with her. I told her that she would wake up at around 2:30 with a pounding headache, simmering nausea, and a soul full of regret and then the phone would ring and it would be the guy. She yelled GODDAMN IT YOU ASSHOLE YOU’RE RIGHT. She then drunk-dialed her mother.

All in all she was a pretty friendly and entertaining drunk. She high-fived me twice when I made fun of her. I should have manipulated her into casual, pointless sex. Why do I always think of these things afterwards?

Eventually they left to get into additional trouble. Fortunately Danielle wasn’t drunk. Matt and I were looking at each other like: well then. Drunk people!

Andy gave updates on the babygrinder industry that as usual scared the shit out of me, and Cat showed up, and other people showed up who only show up on holidays. That was kind of cool.

I actually don’t know what to do when I feel badly treated by someone, but I don’t think it’s really something that can be fixed, and it makes me want to fix it when that’s not useful, and I can’t get rid of the person or the situation or the feeling. Noticing that tonight made me realize that one thing I’m very bad at handling is crap situations in which there’s nothing I could or should do. I feel a sense of misplaced urgency that’s maddening when action would either be useless or destructive.

I’m a “make it better” person, I guess.

Los Primos makes one fucking great pork taco. Especially when you’re not one of the two abusively stereotypical mortgage bro guys who keeps calling the Mexican guy behind the counter “my brother” as he asks for free stuff.

the bitter asswipe rides again

  1. Hey look everybody there’s a DEAD ABORTED FETUS IN THE SKY AAA AAA AAAAIIIIIIGGGH. Man, it’s bad enough when they bring those pictures down to the beach and freak out the children.
  2. Yeah, so, the space shuttle broke again. And stuff.
  3. I’m sure brianenigma will welcome this opportunity to actually wear the sea monkeys around his neck instead of just watching them slowly die in a tank.
  4. Our oppressive goons are also comic opera idiots.
  5. presents a combo of Michael Jackson probably wouldn’t like emacs either and dude you shouldn’t be apologizing to Jennifer.