I’m not sure what the link is with heavy-duty SUVs, but I fear the worst.

Overweight passengers cause airlines problems.

I think my ironic metaphor lobe just seized.

Let’s get this straight. We import petroleum at ruinous cost and involve ourselves in wars and alliances to ensure supply. We use this oil for, among other things, producing fertilizers so that we can have cheap food. The oil is then burned to produce and deliver a combination of snack foods and electronic entertainment which increases our bulk to the point of diabetic epidemic.

It is then discovered that in order to carry the new porcine citizens around in the air more fuel must be used…

I have a headache now.