DEAR AMERICA

I AM FINE. WE ARE WINNING THE WAR HERE IN IRAQ. THE LOCALS LOVE US. I WAS HURT A BIT IN ACTION BUT I WILL BE BRAVE. DONALD RUMSFELD IS A GOOD, KIND MAN. THERE ARE MANY STATUES OF GEORGE BUSH HERE. PAY NO ATTENTION TO THE NEGATIVE NONSENSE FROM THE LIBERAL MEDIA.

SEND MY LOVE TO $RELATIVE_1 AND $RELATIVE_2, AND TELL $PET TO BE A GOOD $PET_TYPE. PLEASE SEND COOKIES.

REMEMBER TO VOTE FOR OUR PRESIDENT!

LOVE,

$SOLDIER

http://www.cbsnews.com/stories/2003/10/13/iraq/main577716.shtml

6 thoughts on “DEAR AMERICA

  1. Lovely!
    I’ve been picking up definite signs of a new propoganda initiative to convince people that EVERYTHING’S OK IN IRAQ!!!
    There were a few hushed blurbs about 2 weeks ago saying ‘the media is just focusing on the bad’. Then there was this dolt who runs a web newspaper in the south somewhere on the Daily Show who broadcasted the same message. Jon Stewart, as he is so good at doing, went really light on the critical questions while wearing a face that screamed “I’m trying to understand the world you come from, but you’ve gotta be fucking kidding me…”

  2. It reminds me of the canned athletic speeches, after every single american football/baseball/olympic win (and loss for that matter). Football coach, speech coach, and trench coach now, I guess.

  3. This is my favorite part:
    “When I told him he wrote such a good letter, he said: ‘What letter?'” Timothy Deaconson told Gannett. “This is just not his (writing) style.”

  4. Of course the article is funny as all hell. More though for the idiocy in the Army PR department though. Ghost writing is a fairly normal PR practice in all sectors. Telling soldiers that if they would like their names in the paper, and they wont even have to write a word (which might not be possible for some grunts to do on thier own) would easily produce enough to agree to the ‘intent’ of the letter. Someone just got lazy and did not create a new letter for each individual soldier.

Leave a Reply

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.