Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you:
I want to sign up just so I can somehow bring them down in a clattering crash of marketing MBAs and viral business plans.
NOTE: This showed up as a sponsored link in a google search for Scientology stuff. Spooky.
Be My Blog 
Hey! Don’t you be googling for Scientology! They find spooky ways to ruin your life!
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what’s worse is, i was searching for scientology pissing calvin stickers. seen those? he’s peeing on psychiatry
what a world, what a world
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hey conrad, have you heard about new vanilla coca-cola? you really ought to try it. why, it’s probably one of the ice-coldest, most refreshing beverages i’ve ever consumed! it comes in a really keen bottle that you can keep and put on a little knick-knack shelf in your kitchen, if you’d like. and when i was drinking it, all of these pretty girls kept coming up to me and saying, “hey! is that new vanilla coke?” and i was all, “yes! you’ve gotta try it!” quite the ice breaker! you really ought to grab hold of a bottle if you haven’t done so yet!
hey, at least people will have something to talk about now, other than the weather.
also: who is xenu?
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Sign me up for your revolution.
I’m tempted to suggest unleashing the hordes of Something Awful, but it might require a bit more subtlety than vulgarity.
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