I keep forgetting to post this

Seen a while back while waiting on the freeway for roadside assistance: A large pickup truck, painted on the tailgate in huge letters with:

I’D RATHER BE CUMMIN THAN STROKIN

In or out of context this is a jarring thing to see on the road. I hereby provide context:

The owner of this truck owns a Dodge pickup which uses a Cummins brand diesel engine. He feels strongly that said brand of diesel engine is superior to Ford diesel engines, which are called “Powerstroke.”

I understand the intent of his message. Clearly he wants to indicate that his engine choice implies a sexual choice: he does not wish to masturbate, hence “strokin.”

However, the activities of “cummin” and “strokin” are not exclusive. Aficionados of masturbation will immediately object: Hey! We stroke in order to come! And then we’re cummin!”

Since I was stuck on the shoulder of Interstate 710 at Atlantic/Bandini at the time I didn’t have time to follow this gentleman and point out the contradiction inherent in his signage.

Perhaps he should have said: “I’d prefer to be cummin due to my conquest of a female human than strokin my own male member in order to achieve orgasm on my own, which is humiliating to me, and I feel the same way about my engine choice of Cummins Diesel over Powerstroke Diesel. It is the right choice for diesel engines without a doubt and gives me the same sense of control and desirability that mutually consensual coitus does over masturbatory activity.”

Or maybe he should of just gave the fuck up and not painted his truck with that sign.

HONK HONK HONK THE BIG WHALE-SAVING TRUCK IS HERE

FOLKS I’M SHOWING MY SUPPORT FOR THE OCEAN AND THE BEACH AND THE FISH AND THE WHALES AND THE SEA ANEMONES AND THE SURFERS AND THE LAUGHING, RUNNING CHILDREN IN THE WAVES AND OUR FUTURE ON THE PLANET BY PUTTING THIS ORNAMENTAL LICENSE PLATE ON MY PIECE OF SHIT TRUCK THAT GETS 14 MILES PER GALLON AND IS ENTIRELY EMPTY BUT EXTREMELY SHINY BECAUSE THAT’S HOW I ROLL!!!

CHECK MY SHIT OUT!

immigrant schlong

So, O.C. goatee guy with the shiny truck. You think you’re badass because you blow 10 mpg in your lifted 4×4 and occasionally drive on a trail? Maybe because you have a buddy who did the Baja 1000 once? Let us show you an SU fuckin’ V:

http://www.icechallenger.co.uk/

This is a modification on the typical vehicle in Iceland, where instead of showing off the locals are concerned with getting around on a mixture of snow, ice, and sharp volcanic rock. Interestingly even though the thing gets shitty mileage it uses a tenth the amount of fuel it would take for an airplane to go the same distance.

via Autoblog and Forbes

Rasputin is a truck.

truck

There is one achievement of the last century that will stand without a doubt, and that is the 1980s era Toyota minitruck. In this Google video you see this greatness made manifest, as Jeremy Clarkson and crew do their best to destroy a 100,000 mile+ former farm truck with impact, seawater, fire, and other things.

Every broke person I hung out with in the 80s and early 90s drove one of these things. I’d buy one today. pbd had one that later the_silent_one had too. That was a 1980, wasn’t it? Greg’s was an ’88 and he put 100,000 miles of L.A. messenger/courier work on it before he sold it. The Chadian army blew up Libyan tanks with them. They. Will. Not. Die.

Is the Tacoma still that good, I wonder?