FROM THE PUBLIC SERVICE RADIO: THINGS TO BE REMOVED FROM OTHER THINGS:
- Snake in yard.
- Cat in wall.
- Ducks in manhole.
SEEN ON THE FREEWAY:
- Old black lady with flowered Sunday hat, driving beater Ford Taurus, bumper sticker: MY GAMER FRAGGED YOUR HONOR STUDENT.
- Harley biker with ginormous Canadian flag flying on back of bike.
- Ancient Cadillac veering from lane to lane with license plate holder DRUNK ON THE HOLY SPIRIT.
Beverage we won’t be drinking: Flavored Jim Beam endorsed by Kid Rock.
CD we won’t be purchasing: Starbucks hip-hop compilation.
Product or service we wholly endorse: Soundway Records, particularly their compilations of Nigerian 1960s psycho-afro-rock and Colombian “Champeta Criolla” African music.