Tag: danger

HAZARDOUS ELK

I heard a Canadian Tourism Ad on the radio in my car yesterday. The ad tried to put me in a sound picture in which I was on an amazing golf course playing the game of my life while sweet birds sang etc and an elk walked on to the course. And the tag was something like “and you don’t mind an interruption in your game, because an ELK IS ON THE COURSE!” Followed by the call your travel agent spiel.

I’m not sure what your reaction might be, but were I on a golf course and an elk appeared, I would run like hell. Who wants to get kicked to death? Is there a baby elk over there? Wow these things are pretty fast OH GOD THE ANTLERS

There was another ad right afterwards in which I was instructed to picture myself paddling a kayak or canoe on Lake Louise having a peak experience. That didn’t sound so bad except for the Implied Insects, which are universal in traveling anyhow.

But no elk for me, please.

rotating knives

mendel alerts me to this photo taken by his father. Apparently Canadians are pretty hardcore about their national day of celebration, enough so that they’re willing to give happy, water-bottle-waving celebrants a shot at the noise, dust blast, and extreme fucking danger of a military helicopter landing zone.

I know they’re not in the roped-off zone etc. etc. but if it was me I’d be some distance from that scene unless it was imperative that I get in the helicopter right away. I have no need to follow in Vic Morrow’s… er… headsteps?

Mack, Kenn, can you confirm that this is insane?

Not likely to get national coverage

I’m fascinated by this one, though: $500K Seized: Strange Situation at Nuclear Plant.

Yeah, so. Big truck full of stuff. Nuke plant. Five hundred grand in small bills. Trucker with no ID. This sounds like the beginning of a Bob Trout story. One hopes the nuke plant is a coincidence and it’s just the usual drug deal/money laundering gone wrong.

Or maybe if you mix your crack with plutonium it’s even better!