We daren’t go a hunting because of the TOTALLY INSANE FREAKAZOID HIPPIES that all BELIEVE IN FAIRIES and DANCE AROUND IN BATHROBES AND WINGS.
That’s where I met the Leprechaun. He tells me to burn things.
Up the airy mountain, down the rushy glen
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They are entirely too close to my home.
I shall have to form a drive down anti-fairy squad, armed with soap and glitter cleanser (and machetes).
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i don’t wanna sound queer or nothin’, but unicorns totally KICK ASS.
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Yeah! And so do fairies, for that matter. I’m a big fan of mythic tale and fantastic narrative. Just not so much with the big dressup party and the bathrobes and the sonic orgone meditatotron etc.
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Once upon a time
…me and my evil next door neighbor were walking towards th’ downtown and passed by th’ local public lib-ary, whereupon we spied a pile of books out by the garbage and a pretty youngish blongd gal sifting through them. We made a beeline – he for the gal and me, being me, for the books.
She told us a bit about herself as we all sifted through what was there – the library had her number an would call her when they were discarding books, which they did when they received donations that were damaged in costly and irreparable ways. These books in particuar, some of them were mildewed, and it was far better for the library to throw them away than to clean them and risk exposing other books to an agressive moisture-fungus like mildew.
But in particular, she was looking for books about unicorns. She was a unicorn nut. Not in that ‘I’m a cute girl – I like cute things and kittens/puppy dogs/sanrio stuff’; no, sir. She believed in them. I grabbed a book that I still have, and still have never read, cast a ‘WTF?’ glance over at my evil next door neighbor, who was giving one back, and we got the fuck away from the crazy Newport Beach unicorn lady.
And we all lived happily ever after.
The end.
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I bent my wookie!
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Time to curl up in a little ball and shiver
That man in the bathrobe looks *exactly* like my father!
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